Torn and battered everytime i walk out of the examination hall or battlefield would be a more apt term. I keep asking myself, assessing my own performance(or lack thereof) for that particular paper. It has been not smooth sailing so far...

For the first time. Guess what? The chem paper is easier than the math paper. The math paper is just a pure killer. Totally not doable. I hated it. Doesn't help when the invigilator is my math teacher, sitting RIGHT in front of me. Gosh the tremendous amount of pressure that he unknowingly imposed upon me. I am so traumatized by the whole experience. I still am. That feeling of knowing you did practice for math and yet the paper is just so complicated. Can't help but ask what's the point of studying so much. Alright i shall take comfort in the fact that i did know how to do the MI and summation qns cause i did it in some revision exercise somewhere. It just doesn't seem enough...

Chem and geog. I hope and pray. I can't say anything more. Time management for chem!! And i chiong through geog. Good or bad thing? I can't decide. Know why? Cause it either means that i have nothing to write/did not write enough to score a decent grade or that i know my stuffs so well it flows out of me really efficiently. I can't say which i only know i got really tensed during the exams my shoulders ached so much i had to stop writing for a while. It was that bad.

3 papers over. I'm out of sorts. Mood swings. Raging hormones going crazy. I'm in such a mess. If only you had said yes. Maybe things might have been different. Maybe.

I like this. Maybe i read it somewhere maybe i just thought of it. I'm not too sure. "For the amount of insecurities that i have are so numerous, they can wrap around me like a security blanket." The irony of it.

I'm so low down in the doldrums. =(
  ¶ 10:21 PM