Friday, May 26, 2006
Warning! long post ahead! Read at ur own risk!
I don't like lying. To anyone and most importantly, to myself. Yuck! U noe the feeling?? It feels real horrible especially when u are lying to urself. The kind of deceiving implication that it has, bluffing urself in so many other ways juz so that u can not think about the matter at hand? Blahz. I noe i probably don make sense to many of u. Anyways.. It does not really matter. It would take a genius to noe wad i'm trying to hit at. LOL! Yeah..
-loves-
So much for that. Ytd was a cool day!! Umz.. Can mean that literally and also in context(can't think of any other word. xp) Sorrie my eng juz sucks. My chinese too... So basically... =( Ytd was the finals of the soccer match against vj. Went all the way to jalan besar stadium to watch them play. The whole school went!! Then it started raining... Booz.. So much so that the match was played almost an hour later than it was supposed to be played. making the whole event ending only at 7 plus.
It was such a nice day for me. I got to see all those ppl that i had missed so so much since leaving vj. Trust me, it wasn't easy seeing everybody again. At some juncture i really felt at home at the vj side and i felt like a traitor. Do u noe how heartbreaking it is? I felt like crying when i saw all those ppl that i had grown to love and missed lots. Seeing them again complicated my feelings. Haiz.. I noe we can never turn back time but the memories are still fresh and clear in my mind. It only seemed like ytd that i left all of them. Even my ct teacher rmb me. I was so touched!! It really means a lot to me for u to say that simple "hi" cause i noe that through that, u have thought about me and really considered me an integral part of 06S56. I was exhilarated and depressed at the same time. Hmm.. Weird feeling eh. Never thought it was quite possible.
I saw the whole ahs gang that stayed at vj, my class 06S56, my senior class plus my angel!!(hey thanks for the little prezzie! I like it!=) Thanks for the thought weenky!), my darling og members!! And all the other random ppl that i noe.. =) Oh ya!! And lisabelle!! Love her! Hahaz.. =) And huay shan and wei shan. Ooh.. Zwing! Oh! So many so many ppl!! =)
Talked lots to them, receiving and giving hugs all the way through the vj crowd. The vj ppl muz have thought i'm crazy!! I missed huayshan la! That crazy gal and she's so nice! =) Talked nineteen to a dozen to her. So much so much to catch up!! Not easy finding her considering my phone dying on me before i managed to contact her. But as fate would have it, i recognised her HAIR from the back and picked her out from the hundreds of ppl present! =) Hahaz.. Can u tell that i'm really happy? Yup! Oh and she's gonna go for lunch someday after mid-yrs. yay!! And lisabelle!! Hahaz.. U got a shorter skirt than me and i would have the pleasure of saying "I TOLD U SO" xp. It feels really great to see ya again since u are rarely free to chat and gossip and bitch. LOL! Yeah i really missed those times where i could juz pop next door and shout "belle!!" then juz go crazy talking about anything under the sun. So cool! Many things have changed since then huh? Have i changed too? I think i did but i'm not sure...
It seemed like a social affair there at the stadium cause i was constantly running around saying hi and hello here and there. =) Even the ahs batch of ppl came! Half of 4F was there as well. Hahaz.. So cool. =) The match was an interesting one. Although mj lost to vj by a score of 4-2, I think mj played well and fought hard. Vj juz did better. Yup! It is the spirit that counts in the end the memories of training would be etched in their minds forever the medal or trophy is merely a representation of the win. It does not matter as much, in my opinion. Very exciting second half of the match!! U could sense the tension and silent urging of the spectators with regards to those on the field. "Go! U can do it!"... I think it really helps in bonding the school together not forgetting bonding the schools involved together too.
Personal reflections huh? Hmm.. I think it was hard for me at the end of the match when ppl asked me "So Joyce, who won in the end for u??" I really din noe wad to say to that. Did mj win by playing as champions and with perseverance and determination or did vj win outright. It is a matter of divided loyalties. It pained me that ppl would ask me that. I don deny that i loved vj and that the Victorian spirit is inside me-deep. But i noe that no matter wad, the reality is that i'm now part of mj i am supposed to be loyal to them. So wad do u do when ur mind conflicts with ur heart? Or rather, ur ideology go against ur expected behavior? I don't noe.. Don ask. =(
This is gonna be a real long entry... If u have no patience i suggest u stop reading.
So the match was over and yup... I donno.. Feeling so confused. ='(
-loves-
After the match, after the cheering, after the announcements, It was already 7 plus. Late... But my stomach was hungry so went makan. Wad was a 4 person diner turned out to be a mini squash dinner. Lol! It was real fun. Trekking through unknown territory(at least for me) I felt lost lo.. But i juz followed along behind the leaders and somehow at some point got lost in myself. Ooh.. Ya. Muz thank singwei for carrying my bag for me. It was super heavy. Thanks! =) Foraged our way through endlessly winding roads with potential traffic disasters at every other corner, We were traveling in perpetual fear. LOL! I'm crapping. xp There is something magical about walking in the dark talking about crazy stuff and juz talking. I can't explain it but well... Can someone save me from this dilemma of always not knowing wad to say? It is getting rather annoying... Hmph! Attempted to walk all the way to suntec with Sharon and tingyan shouting my name along the journey for a short period of time and me laughing and grinning at all the silly things that we talked about, dashing across the road putting our lives at jeopardy, me looking at all the weird shop names and commenting about them... Lots of stuff that made the journey seem shorter than it was. It helped that i was not carrying my bag...xp
Finally got to a bus stop with me feeling vv lost cause rmb? My phone died! Okie nvm.. We were somewhere near Bugis when we decided to hop on a bus that would take us to plaza singapura. I have no idea nor recollections about the bus service number cause i was so trusting i juz board the bus. Hahaz... Spent half the time on the bus teasing each other, mostly Limian who was missing and Suhan who was so vehemently trying to deny and defend herself. Aiyo.. So scandalous!! So we arrived.
Dinner was swensens after walking around looking like a bunch of lost blue sheep. MEeehh! xp Then my boss was looking for me. Urgh! Wants me to work this sat and sun. I don want to but she said that she can't find anyone and thought of me. Blahz! I juz rmb that mon is our gp paper so i won work. Have to call and tell her later. Aww.. I feel so bad. =( That was totally random. Yup. So i had baked rice for dinner and the teasing ensued. Hahaz.. The seniors are really... No comments.
Kuan loong made me read CHINESE!! I read that short-less-than-one-paragraph of words and turned to him cross-eyed. Blahz. I'm not fantastic in chinese so i got him to read it to me. Turned out that he could not read every word as well. Juz skimming through all the words and getting the gist of it. Then i realised why i don understand the passage. CAUSE i thought some of the names of characters in the book were names of places and objects that they were named after! That's why all din make sense. -.-"
Great dinner. Then since it was late, decided to head home as most of the shops were closing anyway. Mrt and travellator. Gosh it reminds me of relative velocity!! xp. And i grinned and laughed and smiled so much that my cheek muscles were so sore. Ew.. Wad great company. Lol! Glad that today we have a full day off. Cause in this case, my dad would not nag and complain that i was out too late, compromising my slp and not being able to be attentive in class the next day. YAY! It all worked out marvelously! =)
Mrt was real squeezy and i was squashed and suffocated standing between the door and kl. *Gasp for air... But luckily i managed to survive. =) All the way to pasir ris. Heex. Frm tanah merah ppl start leaving.. Singwei then suhan then artica(did i spell wrong??xp)and edmund then me and kl! The train was empty leaving our laughter behind echoing through the carriages.. Ooh...
I enjoyed myself thoroughly ytd. =) Let's go play pool and go out someday again alrights? And pls pls change the bbq date!! ( I know this would not be possible but well.. I can not go..) Yup!
-loves-
I wrote a mini essay!! OMG! Tonight go for guitar concert. =)
Another thing. If u have read till here. Good for u! u have great patience to read through the junk that i wrote. LOL! Sometimes juz don take wad i type as really that alrights. Yup!
Found this: "Why love if losing hurts so much? We love to know that we are not alone." C.S. Lewis
Good quote. Go decipher the meaning... =)
I don't like lying. To anyone and most importantly, to myself. Yuck! U noe the feeling?? It feels real horrible especially when u are lying to urself. The kind of deceiving implication that it has, bluffing urself in so many other ways juz so that u can not think about the matter at hand? Blahz. I noe i probably don make sense to many of u. Anyways.. It does not really matter. It would take a genius to noe wad i'm trying to hit at. LOL! Yeah..
-loves-
So much for that. Ytd was a cool day!! Umz.. Can mean that literally and also in context(can't think of any other word. xp) Sorrie my eng juz sucks. My chinese too... So basically... =( Ytd was the finals of the soccer match against vj. Went all the way to jalan besar stadium to watch them play. The whole school went!! Then it started raining... Booz.. So much so that the match was played almost an hour later than it was supposed to be played. making the whole event ending only at 7 plus.
It was such a nice day for me. I got to see all those ppl that i had missed so so much since leaving vj. Trust me, it wasn't easy seeing everybody again. At some juncture i really felt at home at the vj side and i felt like a traitor. Do u noe how heartbreaking it is? I felt like crying when i saw all those ppl that i had grown to love and missed lots. Seeing them again complicated my feelings. Haiz.. I noe we can never turn back time but the memories are still fresh and clear in my mind. It only seemed like ytd that i left all of them. Even my ct teacher rmb me. I was so touched!! It really means a lot to me for u to say that simple "hi" cause i noe that through that, u have thought about me and really considered me an integral part of 06S56. I was exhilarated and depressed at the same time. Hmm.. Weird feeling eh. Never thought it was quite possible.
I saw the whole ahs gang that stayed at vj, my class 06S56, my senior class plus my angel!!(hey thanks for the little prezzie! I like it!=) Thanks for the thought weenky!), my darling og members!! And all the other random ppl that i noe.. =) Oh ya!! And lisabelle!! Love her! Hahaz.. =) And huay shan and wei shan. Ooh.. Zwing! Oh! So many so many ppl!! =)
Talked lots to them, receiving and giving hugs all the way through the vj crowd. The vj ppl muz have thought i'm crazy!! I missed huayshan la! That crazy gal and she's so nice! =) Talked nineteen to a dozen to her. So much so much to catch up!! Not easy finding her considering my phone dying on me before i managed to contact her. But as fate would have it, i recognised her HAIR from the back and picked her out from the hundreds of ppl present! =) Hahaz.. Can u tell that i'm really happy? Yup! Oh and she's gonna go for lunch someday after mid-yrs. yay!! And lisabelle!! Hahaz.. U got a shorter skirt than me and i would have the pleasure of saying "I TOLD U SO" xp. It feels really great to see ya again since u are rarely free to chat and gossip and bitch. LOL! Yeah i really missed those times where i could juz pop next door and shout "belle!!" then juz go crazy talking about anything under the sun. So cool! Many things have changed since then huh? Have i changed too? I think i did but i'm not sure...
It seemed like a social affair there at the stadium cause i was constantly running around saying hi and hello here and there. =) Even the ahs batch of ppl came! Half of 4F was there as well. Hahaz.. So cool. =) The match was an interesting one. Although mj lost to vj by a score of 4-2, I think mj played well and fought hard. Vj juz did better. Yup! It is the spirit that counts in the end the memories of training would be etched in their minds forever the medal or trophy is merely a representation of the win. It does not matter as much, in my opinion. Very exciting second half of the match!! U could sense the tension and silent urging of the spectators with regards to those on the field. "Go! U can do it!"... I think it really helps in bonding the school together not forgetting bonding the schools involved together too.
Personal reflections huh? Hmm.. I think it was hard for me at the end of the match when ppl asked me "So Joyce, who won in the end for u??" I really din noe wad to say to that. Did mj win by playing as champions and with perseverance and determination or did vj win outright. It is a matter of divided loyalties. It pained me that ppl would ask me that. I don deny that i loved vj and that the Victorian spirit is inside me-deep. But i noe that no matter wad, the reality is that i'm now part of mj i am supposed to be loyal to them. So wad do u do when ur mind conflicts with ur heart? Or rather, ur ideology go against ur expected behavior? I don't noe.. Don ask. =(
This is gonna be a real long entry... If u have no patience i suggest u stop reading.
So the match was over and yup... I donno.. Feeling so confused. ='(
-loves-
After the match, after the cheering, after the announcements, It was already 7 plus. Late... But my stomach was hungry so went makan. Wad was a 4 person diner turned out to be a mini squash dinner. Lol! It was real fun. Trekking through unknown territory(at least for me) I felt lost lo.. But i juz followed along behind the leaders and somehow at some point got lost in myself. Ooh.. Ya. Muz thank singwei for carrying my bag for me. It was super heavy. Thanks! =) Foraged our way through endlessly winding roads with potential traffic disasters at every other corner, We were traveling in perpetual fear. LOL! I'm crapping. xp There is something magical about walking in the dark talking about crazy stuff and juz talking. I can't explain it but well... Can someone save me from this dilemma of always not knowing wad to say? It is getting rather annoying... Hmph! Attempted to walk all the way to suntec with Sharon and tingyan shouting my name along the journey for a short period of time and me laughing and grinning at all the silly things that we talked about, dashing across the road putting our lives at jeopardy, me looking at all the weird shop names and commenting about them... Lots of stuff that made the journey seem shorter than it was. It helped that i was not carrying my bag...xp
Finally got to a bus stop with me feeling vv lost cause rmb? My phone died! Okie nvm.. We were somewhere near Bugis when we decided to hop on a bus that would take us to plaza singapura. I have no idea nor recollections about the bus service number cause i was so trusting i juz board the bus. Hahaz... Spent half the time on the bus teasing each other, mostly Limian who was missing and Suhan who was so vehemently trying to deny and defend herself. Aiyo.. So scandalous!! So we arrived.
Dinner was swensens after walking around looking like a bunch of lost blue sheep. MEeehh! xp Then my boss was looking for me. Urgh! Wants me to work this sat and sun. I don want to but she said that she can't find anyone and thought of me. Blahz! I juz rmb that mon is our gp paper so i won work. Have to call and tell her later. Aww.. I feel so bad. =( That was totally random. Yup. So i had baked rice for dinner and the teasing ensued. Hahaz.. The seniors are really... No comments.
Kuan loong made me read CHINESE!! I read that short-less-than-one-paragraph of words and turned to him cross-eyed. Blahz. I'm not fantastic in chinese so i got him to read it to me. Turned out that he could not read every word as well. Juz skimming through all the words and getting the gist of it. Then i realised why i don understand the passage. CAUSE i thought some of the names of characters in the book were names of places and objects that they were named after! That's why all din make sense. -.-"
Great dinner. Then since it was late, decided to head home as most of the shops were closing anyway. Mrt and travellator. Gosh it reminds me of relative velocity!! xp. And i grinned and laughed and smiled so much that my cheek muscles were so sore. Ew.. Wad great company. Lol! Glad that today we have a full day off. Cause in this case, my dad would not nag and complain that i was out too late, compromising my slp and not being able to be attentive in class the next day. YAY! It all worked out marvelously! =)
Mrt was real squeezy and i was squashed and suffocated standing between the door and kl. *Gasp for air... But luckily i managed to survive. =) All the way to pasir ris. Heex. Frm tanah merah ppl start leaving.. Singwei then suhan then artica(did i spell wrong??xp)and edmund then me and kl! The train was empty leaving our laughter behind echoing through the carriages.. Ooh...
I enjoyed myself thoroughly ytd. =) Let's go play pool and go out someday again alrights? And pls pls change the bbq date!! ( I know this would not be possible but well.. I can not go..) Yup!
-loves-
I wrote a mini essay!! OMG! Tonight go for guitar concert. =)
Another thing. If u have read till here. Good for u! u have great patience to read through the junk that i wrote. LOL! Sometimes juz don take wad i type as really that alrights. Yup!
Found this: "Why love if losing hurts so much? We love to know that we are not alone." C.S. Lewis
Good quote. Go decipher the meaning... =)
